For our 5-year anniversary, September 25, 2009.
My intention in writing this letter is not out of pride or hopes of something in return. I honestly don’t need to hear what you all think of me for writing it. That’s not important; though it’s nothing against you. I had to check myself and ask if that was indeed the case. I can say with a clean conscience, though, that it isn’t, thankfully. This isn’t about me. This is about my bride, my helper, my best friend, my wife.
This letter really is more about Melissa than it is to her. Though, I know she’ll read it eventually, and that is my intention. This is simply my way of saying that I love her on this particular day, our five year anniversary.
Not only do I want you to see that I love her… I want you to see how much there is to love about her. There are proverbs about children and husbands praising the mothers and wives in their lives in public… honoring her and telling her praises for all to hear and join. This is the best way I can think to do that.
I wish I was able to describe her using music, rather than words. To do it in such a way that you could understand how she fits in the song of my life. I’m not a musician, though. I wish I was. Perhaps I could write this much more poetically and accurately. The things I feel for her seem to be echoed in the notes and crescendos of the really big songs that move you. I trust you can understand that. She would. She knows me that well.
Even as I write this, with my headphones on listening to one of those big songs, I feel those divinely-given emotions that I have for her in those rare, sweeping rifts that make you close your eyes and shiver with a chill up your back that you wish would never pass. It’s a moment of fullness with an eternal feel to it. Those musical peaks seem to speak the same language of perfect union and symphony which I feel about her. I hope you know it. It’s a feeling words just can’t capture.
God is amazing. It’s so easy to see his fingerprints in the perfectly-balanced creations of music, nature, and marriage. What a blessing and testimony of His grace that He would share with me one of His incredible creations; and what an even more incomprehensible blessing that He would choose to share a daughter of His of such integrity and beauty. Who am I that he would save my life, let alone entrust me with such a treasure as marriage to her?
In our marriage, I’ve been so blessed to see her grow. Her devotion to integrity… her desire for modesty… her call to be a loyal and committed friend… she desired these things when we were younger, but she has been teaching me so much more in these areas lately. Even in the daily things, she is an inspiration. For a girl that said she couldn’t cook, she’s been helping her two boys fill out quite well! She isn’t afraid to learn new things. Her initiative and self-teaching are really an encouragement to me. And her dedication to our family, in doing everything she can to support us through wise spending and saving, provides just as much for our family as any paycheck… yet she does it without any boss looking over her shoulder. I appreciate her discipline so much.
And what about my son? Why should our Creator ever bless me with such a joyous, healthy bundle of energy such as him? Such grace He pours out on us. Such grace. And then to multiply that grace in my life, God has put a pure and distinct desire in Melissa’s heart to be a mother that would raise Jonas and future children under His Lordship. A desire that she’s already pursuing, and He is already blessing to bear fruit.
Even now, at 15 months, the joy of the Lord which is in Melissa is showing in our son. Her love for music and life come pouring out of him as he beams with his 8-tooth smile and dances to any object emitting a beat (the rhythms of the radio, tv, and washing machine are all the same in his book). Her desire for family and sharing life with others is wrapped up in his arms as he shows he is quick to hug and greet anyone with a friendly face. Her intelligence and diligence are mirrored with every new word he learns and object he figures out. Her gorgeous eyes and smile are written all over his face. What a wonderful mother she is.
What a beautiful family I’ve been given. What a gorgeous wife I’ve been paired with. What an undeserving man I am. What a generous God we serve.
I love you, Melissa. I loved you for who you were when we were brought together. I love who you have become. I love your desire to become more and more like Christ. And I love, love, love the fact that I get to share my life with you.
Happy anniversary, babe.
For those friends and family reading this, please take the time to leave an encouraging comment for Melissa today. Tell her what you love about her. Make a comment here, send an email or text, or whatever. She may not know why you’re all sending them at first… but she’ll figure it out after awhile. :)
Three Years Away
11 months ago